This might sound weird but I’ve always wanted to punch through a car window *smash!*
I considered myself a calm and collected person. I’m ruled by logic and censors. But there are some that release raw emotion as if it was an overloaded electrical capacitor *smash!* I sometimes admire that in other people; the ability to lose control and give into their base survival instincts. A lot of times when finesse is needed to successfully navigate through a situation it can be an easy release to just lose control. Day in and day out it takes a lot of energy to handle stress with precision.
Its like trying to keep every muscle of your body still in order to thread a needle through a pinhole during a hurricane. The energy is pushing and pulling you into so many different directions- it’s exhausting to fight it. And your mind is racing, it is telling you to just let go and following your instincts, just let go and *smash!*
The truth is that the *smash!* is so easy when you get to that level. There is something in our bodies that craves the release. It’s the fight of the “fight or flight” response and it is so inherently powerful becomes it comes from the deepest core of our being that wants to survive. Some people can access it so easily- they have access to these huge reservoirs of power. That’s what I admire- the power.
Every now and then I feel like I could tap into that power but the conditions that reproduce such an event are so volatile that releasing that energy would be wildly inappropriate at that time. *smash!*
So for now it just has to remain a fantasy. I’ll hold on to my precision and the exhaustive efforts to maintain it under loads of stress. But hopefully, some day in the future I’ll tap into that under a controlled circumstance and just bust through a window *smash!*